Uprooting From The Comfort Zone
You may have guessed from my Instagram that I currently am not based in the UK, but in fact sunny Spain! & boy, is it a gorgeous country. If you're unaware of this change, then I am baffled that you have escaped the constant spam from my social media of all things glorious & Spanish.
& if you're not following me at all, do behave & go give me a cheeky follow? Taaa very much..
So why Spain, eh? Well, I am actually working for a Spanish theatre company who specialize in bringing the magic of performance to schools within & around Valencia.
It's actually going pretty swell to say the least, I've eaten a fair share of local paella & guzzled far too many 'radlers', which are lager & lemon soda mixed together into one refreshing concoction.
The shows themselves are sweaty, chaotic & of course unbelievably rewarding.
Whenever I am fortunate enough to bag a performing contract, I'm always reminded why I continue to pursue acting as a profession. The adrenaline rush you get before stepping on stage for the first time, the terrifying thought of the quick change failing & the dreaded actors block where the lines just flee from your brain.
But there's a thrill that keeps me gagging for more & that is simply why I apply for job after job in hope of one success!
But - there is always the fear of leaving the good old snug comfort zone that always seems to creep up on me.
Don't get me wrong, I adore the home comforts! But I also adore uprooting myself from them & throwing myself into the pits of the totally unknown.
That's probably why I've stuck with one of the hardest professions on the damn planet. The unknown - it doesn't seem to terrify me like it probably should.
In fact, it's a little like a drug for me - I feel fixated & fascinated by its effects.
I've essentially uprooted from my comfortable 9 to 5 job in a local town, abandoned my friends & family (& of course my beloved puppy) & packed up a suitcase to a brand spanking new country where English isn't the first language.
I've also resided with 5 total strangers, who weirdly after a mere 3 weeks feel like could practically pass as close friends who I've known for yonks!
We talk about toilet habits.. I mean, we've passed the acquaintance threshold, right?!
For me, it's very easy to fall into the trap of a comfortable lifestyle where I have all my home comforts at my finger tips. Sometimes I have to physically force myself to move on from that lifestyle before I get stuck, as I know this outcome cares me far more. The fear of my life being at a jolt & not getting the cogs in motion to move onto the next adventure is pretty nerving for me.
Yeah, I could have stayed in my little office job with the loveliest bunch of people but I knew deep down that this was not an aspiration for the long term, nor did I want to stay down in the South East as I begin tackling my late twenties (gross).
Whilst I have the freedom to do so, I intend to take as many performing contracts under my belt as possible. There will be a day where this will no longer be possible & I'll be weighed down by the daunting 'adulty' tasks, which will most definitely restrict me.
I'm also very fortunate to be working for a company that is based in such a gorgeous location & who pay me for essentially pursing my dream. I've mentioned before in a previous blog post that travelling wasn't really for me as I'm a bit of a working bug who likes bringing home the bacon.
Touring is most definitely one of my favourite aspects of acting as you get to see so many different places in such a short space of time.
It also makes me realize how comfortable my life is back at home & it's certainly an eye opener of how my independence lacks in certain aspects. In a way it shows how dependent I am on my current lifestyle & perhaps that's why I fear the big almighty that is 'change'.
Therefore, when the opportunity arises to uproot & move onto a new challenge that flips my snug lifestyle upside down, you bet'cha I'm flinging myself head first!
I can certainly say my paranoia cries out at me with despair each time I dare to tackle one of these challenges, & of course I totally miss so much of my life back at home. There's been a handful of 'regret' moments where I've wanted to crawl back to the UK & take back my old position but I've fought the urge with tooth & nail.
But it's insane how quickly I've settled into my new role within Valencia. I'm actually gutted that we don't have Café Bonbon's back at home because that is some pure angelic coffee magic crammed into one teeny cup.
Today, I even made myself walk to the corner shop & purchase a bottle of red wine & a couple (yes, a couple) of bars of chocolate, which I haven't been able to do alone since arriving.
I am unbelievably proud of myself knowing that I am testing my paranoia & conquering my inner demons that cause so much unnecessary fear. I mean, the people are super lovely & in all honesty I think the language barrier really scares me more than anything.
But again, it's astonishing how much vocabulary you pick up so quickly. I may not be able to have a fluent gaggle with the shop assistant but with small actions & a mixture of Spanish & English we can create the 'would you like a bag?' sentence.
One chocolate bar has been demolished as a reward.
So, that's me folks - uprooted from the daily comforts & flown into a complete whirlwind of an adventure, which seems to bring further delight with each day.
I'm also hitting up a paella competition at the weekend, which is situated in an extremely bustly area & if it weren't for the paella factor would be one of my worst nightmares. However, I've decided to take the plunge & tag along to throw myself in the deep end. Crowded places aren't my strong point but I'm going for the paella.
I'm closing my eyes & focusing on that mountain of paella baby! I. CANT. EVEN. COPE.